The Ethics Committee of the Purrfect Drop Test Laboratory has relocated its monthly meeting from the Conference Room to the sofa. This follows a unanimous vote, taken while three of the five members were asleep.
Agenda
- Approval of last month’s minutes, which are mostly fur
- Review of the vase incident
- Discussion of whether a fish tank counts as a table
- Any other business, including snacks
Reasons for the move
The Conference Room has no cushions and a fairly inflexible chair. The sofa has both warmth and a view of the window. The Chair, Lady Marmalade Quill, said the new location “enhances the quality of ethical thinking by approximately a nap”.
A reminder on conduct
Members must not push the minute book, the agenda or each other. Members must declare any conflict of interest, such as owning the object being tested. The committee also reminds researchers that ethical approval is not required for pushes performed on days that end in “y”.
Minutes will be circulated after the meeting, provided they survive it.
Attendance
All members have confirmed attendance, with two exceptions. Sir Gravy has sent his apologies from beneath a blanket. Pebble the junior researcher is stuck inside a paper bag and will participate by rustling.
Policy on fish tanks
The question of whether a fish tank counts as a table has been before the committee since March. Arguments for include its flat top, its proximity to the edge and the interest of the fish. Arguments against include the fish. The committee expects to adjourn the question until a majority wakes up.
Refreshments
Light refreshments will be provided in the form of a bowl of kibble and a saucer of milk. Members are reminded that the saucer is for drinking, not for testing. Any member found testing the saucer will be asked to explain themselves in a calm and quiet voice, and then to leave.
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